How to Drink with Chinese

Drinking can be a lot of fun, but drinking with Chinese people can be quite tricky. During Chinese new year I attended over 10 drinking occasions with Chinese people and this article is what I learned with my sweat and blood. And vomit.

1 Lower Your Glass

It’s a social custom that you lower your glass when cheers-ing people you respect. However, it’s also a social custom that you lower your glass when the other lowers their glass for you. You don’t want to be seen as an arrogant asshole who holds the glass up straight, so make sure you fight hard to win the Lowering Glass Contest. Whenever someone makes a toast to you, throwing yourself on the floor immediately is a safe defense move, but feel free to choke his neck and make him pass out – it’s never too much to defend your humility.
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2 Keep Up Your Pace

You prefer sipping your red wine slowly and quietly in the corner? Sorry, you are walking into the wrong party. At every Chinese drinking occasion there’s a guy in control of everyone’s pace. He decides what you drink, when you drink, how much you drink, and who you drink with – he is the DJ (Drinking Jockey). A DJ is like a predator at the table – whoever looks him in the eye will die. Watch out for these warning signs: “If you’re a man, drink up!” “If you give me face, drink up!” “If you don’t drink… Drink up!”
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3 Vomit On The Table

Vomiting is embarrassing most of the time, but when you are drinking with Chinese, to drink until you vomit is a valuable virtue. It means you’ve overcome your own limit and become your own God – you’ve become immortal. When a man throws up at the drinking table, his friends adore him, his boss values him, and the girl whom he vomits on falls in love with him. Even thousands of years have passed, people will still be talking about the epic day: “Remember when he vomited like a fountain? Wasn’t it beautiful?”
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4 Don’t Forget To Chui Niu Bi

The easiest way to infiltrate into a Chinese group is to get drunk and enjoy Chui Niu Bi (brag) together. However there are exquisite rules for what you brag about and it can be dangerous if you bring up the wrong topic. You may brag about how many people you’ve beaten up if you’re in the northeast, but what helps blowing up the Niu Bi in the south may be how much you make from stocks. However, a universal topic for Chinese is politics and the government – everyone agrees it’s the best!
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Hope you all enjoy this post. We all know that alcohol kills, but how many are born because of it?

1 Comment

  1. Ha! “We all know alcohol kills, but how many are born becaise of it!” 🙂 That’s perspective! Great line.

    Like

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