20 Honest Gifts For Chinese Valentine’s Day

It’s Chinese Valentine’s Day again – that time when you have to buy your girlfriend an expensive gift in order to get laid. But it’s not only about sex – some gifts may also have a deeper meaning. Today Shameless is here to help you decipher the code, and reveal what each gift really means.

“We both hate flowers, but you want to show off in front of your colleagues so… here they are.”

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“See – I can treat you to something other than dumplings.”

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“This shit cost me a fortune so you’d better pretend you like it.”

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“Not your size? Oh you must have gained weight since we started dating.”

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“It seems like your stomach needs to breathe.”

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“Can you act like a lady for a change? Oh, and stop wearing my basketball shorts.”

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“You better return this to me if we break up someday.”

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“You are almost 12 years old now so I think you may like this!” 

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“You think this is a gift for you, but actually it’s a gift for myself.”

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“Maybe you should try to take more showers.”

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“What? You are not fat at all. Seriously I mean it! I’m just looking out for your health!”

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“If you know what I did to your sock last week when you were gone, you’d know this is an apology.”

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“No, I will not have a baby with you. Stop asking. PS: I saw you poking holes in the old ones.”  

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“Go play with the pet! AKA leave me alone and again, we are not having babies anytime soon.”

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“It’s my way of saying you are nuts. Go see a therapist.”  

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“If you could kiss me less that would be great.”

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“I’d prefer not to floss my teeth every time I go down on you.”

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“I’m not saying you are a control freak, but….”

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“I’ve been trying to find a subtle way to tell you I’m gay.”

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“Go wherever you want, sweetheart. Enjoy the world. Just stay far away from me. Please.”

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